From what I will write, I don't want any "I'm sorry's" please. Because no one is sorry.
Last night I got a call from a friend's daughter, that my dear friend, Nona, had passed over. Even though we expect those calls now, it was still a shock. Nona and I talked on the phone at least once a week. She lived in a small town in Northern Minnesota and I had talked to her a few weeks ago but she wasn't feeling well so I was waiting for her call when she was better.
We met when we were training to be psychiatric nurses in a private hospital, Glenwood Hills, in Minneapolis. You may remember that part of my life from the post on scopolamine. The hospital was
situated in a true healing environment with sprawling hills fenced in-between a lake and a golf course. Sturdy brick buildings with red tile roofs, set in a snowy valley made a restful picture that still remains in my mind. Sadly it all was torn down years ago and I've never been back.
Two student dormitories housed us, one on top a hill and another in the valley. We were allowed to drive the new station wagon (of the first-made after the war) back and forth because the grounds consisted of acres. The station wagon had wood siding that was pretty snazzy to us. Nona and I shared a large room with 2 other students and because we worked shifts, our dorm was always buzzing with activity.
Nona was like our dorm monitor with her many demands. She was tidy to a fault and rode hard on us to keep the place spotless. And yet, Nona was always the one with a bottle of gin stashed in her shoe bag. Many nights we pulled a student through the window when it was past curfew and Nona was high on the list. One night she had been dancing at the big old Marigold Ballroom and lost her purse but as soon as we pulled her through the window, she started a novena to Saint Anthony to find it. Ha Ha
When we talked now in recent times, there was a lot of reminiscence but we both read voraciously and a lot of our conversation consisted of politics and world events. It is such a blessing to be old and still have a keen mind.
So farewell, dear friend. It's been a good show. Save me a bed in your dorm and we'll do it all again.
What a beautiful post. It gave me chills. Yes, a celebration. Onward, to her next adventure!
ReplyDeleteWhat a truly beautiful tribute to your friend :)
ReplyDeleteWonderful tribute indeed and although always sad to see one go, at such an age it has to come to pass at some point. So a celebration should come due. Always said when I go, no friggin funeral or 1000 dollar boxes and such, burn me and chuck the ashes in the litterbox for all I care hahaha
ReplyDeleteA lovely remembrance Manzanita, it caused a furtive pang.
ReplyDeleteTeresa : I thought you may recognize some of the named places.
ReplyDeleteWas the Marigold Ballroom still in existence when you were going out and about. Ha It was on Nicollet .... about 24th. Used to be huge and a floating floor. I don't remember what the heck they built there after it was torn down..... probably an ugly supermarket.
Optimistic : Thanks Keith and thank you for the visit.
Pat : Yeah, you made me laugh. Of course, I guess the litterbox is the spot where you toss ashes. My kids have asked where I want my ashes, to which I reply, "who cares? Whatever is the most convenient place." Knowing my kids, that could be a surprise.
There is nothing as wonderful as an old friend. That shared history is the bond between two people who just happen to be thrown together by circumstance and discover a friend. The worst thing about aging is knowing that we all lose those who are important to us....bit by bit, day by day, one by one. You're right to focus on the memories of what made you friends. Hugs!
ReplyDeleteManzanita, thanks for sharing such a joyful tribute of your friend. Today, the Husband and I are will be attending a celebration for our friend whose body died on New Year's Day as he rescued others. Here's to Nona! and here's to Charlie! Love you, Blog pal.
ReplyDeleteThis is from one of my posts--& I was serious!! I'm not sure about my husband.
ReplyDeleteI’ve told my husband that I didn’t want a regular funeral, with everybody sad. Instead I told him that I wanted fireworks to celebrate my life. He said that fireworks weren’t his thing & offered a compromise—he said he would be willing to stick sparklers in my behind.
Lovely Tribute Manzanita!
ReplyDeleteYour sudden loss is so well put aside in the beautiful tribute you give to her. Your spirit is truly in the right place. Here's to both of you. HUGS
ReplyDeleteThis is a beautiful, loving tribute to your friend of many, many years. I know you will be sad inside but you have so many memories to look back on and to cherish. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteI like this Manzie.
ReplyDeleteBeing back in my hometown my old friends seem to have funerals and mourning as their main priority. I don't understand them and miss hearing from people who don't take death as something so morbidly serious. The older I get the move I'm looking at it as the next great adventure. Of course, whatever is done--a funeral, a simple service, or scattering of ashes--it is all for the living.
Good Friends are few and far between and she was lucky to be able to call you friend
ReplyDeleteNona sounds like she was a real firecracker back in her day. Cheers to her, wherever she is!!!
Anthony : Thanks my friend and it's good to you your name again. You were missed.
ReplyDeleteMellodee : You are so right. I say people just aren't trusting these days but to tell the truth, old friends are the ones you know and can trust. Thanks.
Su-sieee : Oh heavens. I wonder what you mean, rescued others. That sounds like an extremely caring man who would put himself last. Thank you dear friend, for the kind words.
Very nice post for a friend. She would have been pleased how you remembered here I'm sure. Sorry for your loss, Manzanita.
ReplyDeleteFishducky : OMG that cracked me up ( no pun intended) Your husband must think in the "funny" vein, like you do.
ReplyDeletePaige : Thank you friend. See you later.
Heidrun : Thank you for the caring words. It's comforting to have you bloggy friends.
thisisme : Hey, my bloggy friend across the pond. It's nice to have friends like you and your kind words will be with me.
Rubye : Thank you for being here and lending us your wisdom. Where have you been? I've missed you. You are so right, the closer you get to the end, the far less morbid it is.
Terry : You are most likely back home again. Hope you were able to squeeze in some sun. Yes, that is what Nona was, a firecracker. She had leadership quality and O a big heart and would stand by her friends. It's funny but she and Marilyn are both from the same small town in MN.... Duluth. Well, I guess Duluth isn't that small now but they never knew each other because Marilyn is 9 years younger. I must have been kissing fools too because I have a little red rash like you had in the corner of my mouth. Ha
ReplyDeleteSounds like Nona had a good life and liked a little excitement now and again. A life worth living; a life lived well.
ReplyDeleteSadly I too have reached that age when friends slip from our lives.
ReplyDeleteIt is so neat that you all stayed in touch all these years. You gave her a lovely send off recalling fun memories.
You guys had some great times and it is just fantastic of you to share it with us. You are an inspiration Manzanita. Thank you for always being you.
ReplyDeleteRiver : Yes, the thing to live a happy life would be to keep all things in balance. When the scales become lop-sided is when we seem to get in trouble.
ReplyDeletePatti : I lost 4 friends this past year. 2 of them were to alzheimers and they might as well be dead and if you could get through to them, I'm sure that is what they would choose. That is such a demeaning disease. One friend who is suffering from A. has been close to me from kindergarten. That is a year or 2.... ha ha
Hi Manzanita ... she had a good life and sounds like a comfortable ending ... and how lovely that you were friends for so long and chatted regularly ...
ReplyDeleteWith thoughts - Hilary
We should always celebrate the lives that pass. I lost three friends in 2012. It hurts, but my wife and I celebrated their lives and re-lived some great memories. I am certain you will do the same. You are truly an inspiration.
ReplyDeleteI love your last sentence. Sounds like a great friend, and some serious fun.
ReplyDelete((hugs))
Hilary : Thanks you for the encouraging words. Life is so beautiful but it's difficult to grasp that concept when it seems to be creeping along. Then get to the end and zap ..... it is only a twinkle.
ReplyDeleteJJ..... That's a lot of friends that you lost last year. Especially when one gets on in years because one isn't really making any new friends..
It's hard to lose so many family members and long-time friends, isn't it? I, too, got a call from the daughter of my old college roommate... and maid of honor... letting me know that she'd passed away. Not totally unexpected, because she'd been fighting the good fight against cancer for a number of years, but still, it's difficult to wrap my mind around. Like your friend, she too was a firecracker, so it's hard to imagine that fire extinguished. But life goes on. And her daughter and I found plenty of things to laugh about, just as I'm sure you did with your friend's daughter.
ReplyDeleteSounds like Nora was a "character," in the best sense of the word. And someone well-remembered!
ReplyDeleteHilary : I always had many friends from kindergarten but the past couple of years has taken it's toll on long time friends.
ReplyDeleteJJ : You are fortunate that you and your wife are able to enter the twilight years together.
Chuck : Thanks. Maybe she wouldn't be too pleased about me reveal the silly things we did in our youth but she definitely had a heart of gold and wisdom.
Mimi : I think those are the things we love to remember about friends because then we all grow into serious people and are often bogged down with responsibility.
Susan : Losing your bridesmaids is a tough one. Whenever you look at your wedding photos, all those memories come rushing back. I have all my bridesmaids yet from 2 marriages but the husbands are gone. It's like..... what is missing from this photo.
Bear : It's hard to forget such a strong personality. How is your hibernation coming? Better not stick you Bear-nose out too much or it might get frost-bitten. At least that's what has been happening in these parts. Nice to hear from you.
This is so beautiful. Like you, this time in life for me is so difficult because we're losing so many of our loved ones. I just visited my cousin today at the hospital because she had a stroke on Monday.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you have such good memories to make you smile.
Kay, Yes it's difficult as we get older because we see so many of our dear ones leave us. The odd part of this is that I can communicate better with my own kids because they are getting to the age of losing their friends and are also beginning to feel that generational gap with their own kids.
ReplyDeleteSome strokes are tough to deal with. I hope your cousin makes it.