Monday, June 13, 2011

The Time Has Come

The time has come, the walrus said, to talk of many things. I think I'll ramble a little about a few things that have been on my mind lately.

The above logo is from Stephanie's blog challenge at What's So Random. It starts Wednesday, June 15. A blog challenge where you write a post each day for the letters of your name. Your name has to be 5 letters or more. You can use your first, middle, last or a combo. See details at What's So Random.

Every flower plant in my back yard in Bozeman bit the dust while I was living in Helena. The time has come for me to replant everything. That is why, dear bloggy friends, my blogging chair has been a little empty lately. I've been working in the sunshine, getting dirty fingernails and digging holes.

Birds. Where are my birds? I need to attract birds. I bought 2 bird feeders and a humming bird nectar dispenser. Now, what flowers attract birds? I planted bee balm and petunias. Do you have any other suggestions. I still have to get a couple bird baths and then wait for the bird party.

Another thing that's been twirling around in my brain is a question about "True Love." I mean the Cathy/Heathcliff kind of romance that lasts, not only throughout a lifetime, but for all eternity. Throughout my life, I've yearned for that True love but never found it. My first husband was a full-blown Narcissist and it's impossible for them to love. Although I deeply respected my second husband, it still wasn't the True Love I yearned for. Don't misunderstand. My life has been happy because True Love is not a prerequisite for happiness.

Was I looking for pie in the sky and is there really such a love I longed for? There are couples who find it or so I've heard tell. This just wasn't in the cards for me.. This time, I had other lessons to learn. But could it be arranged for next life please? How about it, has anyone found their true love?

P.S. Please let me make it clear..... I'm not yearning for true love for myself at this late date but it was a conversation I had with my granddaughter while working in the gardens. She's at the "true love" seeking age. Ha


  1. For the birdies - plants with lots of blooms for nectar and seeds too and ones that attract lots of insects! :-)

    True love? Oh it exists but I think it's never straightforward - yes more complicated - a little sado masochistic - but lasting like Cathy/Heathcliff!

    Good luck with your blogfest - sounds fun!! Take care

  2. We had a sugar water feeder for humming birds when I was little and lots of different flowers. Our yard was always filled with birds. We planted lillies, roses, petunia, marigolds, and lots of wild flowers that we would dig up when exploring. I don't think it really matters as long as they bloom and a lot. Also having multiple feeders in different locations helped to attract the most birds moreso than the flowers I think.

  3. The birds will come soon enough if you put food out regularly. Give them a bird bath too, or some other water source, they'll need that too.

    The wilder the garden the more life there'll be. Tidy, neat gardens are of no interest to insects.

    Cathy/Heathcliff didn't last very long, as far as I recall? Death got in the way. Besides, didn't she marry someone else?

    True love exists, yes I found it after a long drought. Young love is far too unruly ever to become true love; that comes with maturity and consists mainly of mutual good-will, empathy, tolerance, understanding, a quiet kind of loving and caring.

    There's always the chance of finding it in unexpected places, whatever your age.

  4. OZ birds often like an escape route if they're coming to the garden. Low shrubs and plants that offer cover often make them come. Our birdbath has attracted more birds than we dreamed for - but it took awhile!

    As for the love? Sure, it exists. But be careful what you wish for ...

  5. My true love showed up fairly early, but he was and is an alcoholic. No chance for sharing a life. Maybe next time. I believe love develops into something better with age, now if I could just find someone with whom I could have that verified... :)

  6. Stephen Stills sings, "If you can't be with the one you love, honey, love the one you're with." I wrote a short post about my aunt and uncle. He was in love with another woman during WWII. They broke up, but their love never died. He soon married my aunt Pauline (probably on the rebound)...they were married 60 years. Sixty years of love and kindness...when she passed, you would never have known that there had ever been anyone he could have loved more.

  7. I think I will tackle the "True Love" question...

    Just reading romantic stories wears me out!!! Romantic love is great to get things started, but trying to sustain that kind of relationship is, IMHO, simply exhausting.

    The great romances in fiction are all 'unfinished' works that don't go past the 'happily ever after'. If they did, we would see that these lovers had responsibilities and child-rearing and all the other realities that every couple is faced with, and the transition from romantic love to enduring love would quickly become the theme.

    But where's the excitement in that? Would YOU buy that novel?

    "True Love" is not always exciting, and that's a GOOD thing!

    So check again...I'm betting that every love is "True".

    xoxoxo, clare

  8. Kitty : Plants probably won't show many blooms until next season. That's like buying green bananas for my age. :)
    Oh Heathcliff gypsy man of eternal passion. Sigh.

    Defeenah : Your garden when you were little sounds lovely. Hope mine comes back to find it singing with birds.

    Friko : Thanks for the great comment. I really did find a lasting true love with my 2nd husband but the gypsy Heathcliff with his fire and passion has always beckoned to me. Cathy married but only for security. Heathcliff also married Cathy's sister-in-law but for spite. Oh what tangled webs.
    Your garden always looks beautiful. Hope mine comes back a little bit.
    (or a lot :)

    Red : And you really got the birds. I'm excited about gardening again and bird songs.

    Teresa : I'm sorry it didn't work out this time but I think we go through many lives facing all conditions and learning all lessons and finally, after working through it all, we can live in bliss.

    Turquoisemoon : Oh, that's a sweet story about your Aunt Pauline. Sixty years is a long time. They must have worked it all out. So comforting.

    Clare : You put down some wise words. I'm going to call you "woman-wise." I always believe we are put here to learn new lessons and that always makes me accepting of what life throws my way. And when I think of it as a lesson, nothing ever seems so bad. Ah yes, the book's romantic passion is what young girls yearn for. (and sells books :)

  9. What attracts the birds are flowers and ground cover that are normal for your area. Bet you can find a wild flower mix that contains seeds native to where you live :-)

  10. I guess birds party in a birdbath & people in a hot tub.

    As far as true love, my parents found it. They were married on August 23rd & on the 23rd of EVERY month my dad gave my mom a bouquet of yellow roses. He sometimes couldn't reaaly afford it, but there were the roses every month during their 50 year plus marriage. When she died there was a blanket of yellow roses on her coffin. A few years later, at his funeral, we gave him the same yellow rose blanket. I can't see a yellow rose without thinking of them.

  11. When my birds and bees disappeared, I went to the nursary and asked what would lure them back, butterflies, too. Don't know what works in your area, but what the nursery suggested (kinda odd plants I hadn't heard of) worked here.

    I made it thru the young love, Tab Hunter bit unscathed and lucked out when I met my was the thunderbold. But I wasn't looking for it when it happened...wasn't even thinking about love -- I was off to see the world...screech, the bolt hit on that lucky day.

  12. Thank you for a great intro. for the challenge!! And thank you for joining as well :D

  13. I can tell you how I attract birds.

    When I moved into the home I live now, there were no birds. I don't know where they were, but they sure weren't in my yard.

    I threw out a few scraps of bread, big enough for them to see when flying over. Low and behold... I now have birds. They mostly come to eat my bread or meat scraps I throw out to them, but I have noticed them in the tree out back lately.

  14. What a plethera of knowledge contained both in this blog and all of its comments!! I've thoroughly enjoyed reading everyone's take on what true love is. I think I agree with bits and pieces of each commenters answer. : )

    ~ Wendy

  15. A birdbath, bird feeder are good ideas. Flowers and trees eventually attract birds. I've planted 20 trees, we planted bushes too. Now we have birds.

    True love is an elusive thing, but it does exist. I got it and I love it.

  16. Put a bird feeder out, and the birds will come. That's been my experience.

    Never read the story about Cathy/Heathcliff. I don't know why. I went and looked up definition of "True Love" and came across the "Dummies book" definition. From what they said, I'm living it, and I've lived it twice. But then I wouldn't want to have committed myself to the husband (and the husband before who died), if I didn't like and love him. Communication--the willingness to talk, listen, and share through good and bad times--is really key in my book.

  17. Ah, sweet youth! Yes, I have most certainly found my "true love." It is blissful and magical and takes a lot of understanding and sacrifice to love unconditionally and be loved that way in return. Lovely thoughts in this post! Miriam@Meatless Meals For Meat Eaters

  18. As for the birds, I feed them black oiler sunflower seeds! THEY LOVE THEM! And they don 't make weeds! I also have a butterfly bush that attracts not only birds but butterflies!

    My true love lives across the "pond". He doesn't know it yet, but he will.....*snicker snicker*

  19. Out side of my hummers, I don't feed in the summer but I do suppy a water fountain that they love and it keeps them around, sometimes not where I always want them but that is OK.

  20. Here in Australia grevilleas are great for attracting birds. The foliage is dense and some varieties have thorns to protect the birds from cats.

    I've loved and been married twice and am yet to experience true love.

  21. I don't think you're ever too old to find your true love. You just have to be open to it. I think it's good that it's not a prerequisite to being happy, but you never know when somebody will come in and sweep you right off your feet!

  22. Love your blog! Thanks so much for visiting my blog. I'm so glad I came over for a visit. I've followed so that I won't miss a thing :)

  23. Good luck with the flowers!

    And oh, true love. Hm. It can be sustained with a lot of hard work, methinks.

  24. ah...the quest for true love. How does one want to define a "true love".
    I am back now with my FIrst Love, who I believe was MY true love.
    It was a long journey for both of us to find each other again....after 40 years.
    But, being back with my "true love"...did not come without some sacrifices.
    what is one willing to sacrifice for what they define as "true love".
    I don't really have the answers...I just have, for myself, come full circle.

    I love the birds...we have hummingbirds, yellow finches, swallows, and blue birds....not to mention the ravens and hawks, and eagles.

  25. Jeff : Hey, great idea. The wildflowers, I mean. I have lots of room to plant.

    Fishducky : You did it again... You cracked me up with that hot tub remark. Your story truly brought tears to my eyes. What a sweet and sentimental Father you had. Most of the people here say you have to "work" at a true love and I think your Father did without thinking it was work. Your Mother must have felt like a queen.

    Kittie : I wonder what made your bird leave in the first place. Glad you got them back. That is so sweet to hear you say that about Hubs. I love a romance story. I hear it usually happens that you meet the right love when you're not looking.

    Terry : That's a good idea. I didn't know the birds would come when you tossed the bread in the air. I used to do that with bread when we lived in Florida but then it was always the sea gulls that came.

    Wendy : I've been enjoying reading the comments too. Everyone is giving such great advice.

    Anthony : WOW 20 trees. That a lot of holes to dig. I'm happy for you and your wife.

    Su-sieee : Heathcliff and Cathy are in the wuthering heights. He was this swarthy gypsy boy that her father brought home from one of his trips. They did each marry someone else, she for security and he for spite. But they loved each other always and after they were dead, they were seen walking the moors hand in hand. Oh, it's just a book.:)

  26. Miriam : It sends shivers that so many blog writers have found true love and are very happy. I so glad you did too.

    JJ : I know. You say you have it.

    Irene : A butterfly bush. That's what I need. Wonder if they'll grow in this harsh climate. By pond.... do you mean England?

    Patti : Hummers.... I have no luck with bird stuff. I bought the little hummer feeder and it drips the sweet water out the bottom.

    River : Me too. Twice married, I mean. One was a narcissist and the other was too old for me but we got along very well and he was really good to me.

    Climb2nowhere : I hope you're speaking of younger people. I'm definitely finished looking for love. About time LOL

    Dori : It's my pleasure to meet you. Thanks for stopping.

    Talli : Too bad true love takes so much work. But, I know you have to work at keeping the spark alive.

    Wendy : I'm so happy that things worked out so well for you. That is like a fairy story finding your love again. So warm and fuzzy.

    Thank you everyone for all the neat comments on true love and also helping me get the birds back.